Part 1/2

 

 

 

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Is the jealousy coming from a true breach of your boundaries? This can happen in perfectly healthy relationships! It is usually also a mirror to what is going on inside so do check out part 2 as well! To deal with the external source:

1. What exactly in the situation did you find not okay? Explore your feelings and pinpoint what boundary was crossed and how that made you feel. Is it bringing up anything from your past as well?

2. Have the difficult conversation. Keeping this kind of thing in will lead you towards resentment at best. Adopt a non-reactive stance. You are sharing your perspective and your feelings, not calling them names or accusing them of having harmful intentions.

3. Is your partner okay with that boundary? If they think it is too restrictive, they are allowed to feel and express that! Can you work out an understanding that you’ll both ease into a more balanced way of functioning moving forward? It can be baby steps. DO NOT agree to something you know you can’t do. Nobody wins at that game.

4. Did you have a conversation about this specifically? Take the opportunity to establish clearer limits because not everyone’s definition of monogamy/monogamish/open relationship is the same! AT ALL! Assuming your partner is well intentioned, they’re not out to harm you or poking holes at your common understanding, but things may have been unclear.

If you previously did have the conversation and they agreed, then take off your rose coloured glasses and recognize that you deserve more respect. This is your wonderful, precious life we’re talking about! Too long to spend that much time with someone who doesn’t value you and wayy too short to waste time with that type of person. Either way! 🚩

If you need more clarity, or want to find out how we can bring your long distance relationship to the next level, book a free consultation with me!